He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
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