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• (336): View more from North Carolina

  life is too short to starve

  (678): View more from Georgia

  life is also too short to be fat

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day

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• (386): View more from Florida

  you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt

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• (260): View more from Indiana

  Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five

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  Some Animals Are Total Jerks (10+ pics)

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?

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• (708): View more from Illinois

  I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.

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• (586): View more from Michigan

  he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.

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• (765): View more from Indiana

  It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin

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  23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (804): View more from Virginia

  You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.

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• (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.

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• (561): View more from Florida

  I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw

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• (+61): View more from Australia

  I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.

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• (856): View more from New Jersey

  Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?

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