it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
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