I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
