People in love make me want to vomit
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
