when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
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