he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize