Christians are straight up FREAKS
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize
