you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Randomize