i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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