to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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