just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Randomize
