Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
