There is no way he is gay with that hair.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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