How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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