New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize