i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize