She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
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