K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
