Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Randomize
