4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
