I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
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