I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool