just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
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