Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
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