is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
