I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
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