I just threw up on my dentist
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Randomize