Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
