the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
I miss vodka workout Fridays
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize