i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
She's not a foreskin expert like you
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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