so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize