when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
