Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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