are you so shy because you have an std?
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize