You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Randomize
