So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
you made out with another girl for some wings
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Randomize
