I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize