Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
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