pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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