so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Floor bacon is actually really good
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
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