did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
