Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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