she was so not down for the gang bang
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Randomize
