its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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