guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I understand Curling. That high.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Randomize
