He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
