For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Randomize
