I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
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