yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
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