one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
