I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I would fuck him just for his dog
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
